Muse Monday: Keyboard conundrums

I mentioned last week that I have a new keyboard. Now, I want to tell you more about this new purchase.

When my last keyboard died, it didn’t completely die. I had one key that didn’t want to work anymore: M. One letter out of twenty-six. I had to go buy a new keyboard because of one stinking letter. Could it have been one of the ones that practically never gets used, like “Q” or “Z”? Of course not. I had to lose “M.”

I didn’t think that I used “M” that much, until I didn’t have it available anymore. Even today’s post title used it three times. Would you have wanted to read “use onday: keyboard conundrus”? (Actually, I think I would want to read that. I should have done one last blog post with the broken keyboard. It might have been funny.)

Anyway, my honey took me to get a new keyboard. The keyboard that died was a great keyboard, and I had to find another one just like it. The old keyboard had a curve to it. It wasn’t one of the ergonomic keyboards that has a split in the middle. I found out, on our little shopping trip, that I can’t use those keyboards. I’m not a “proper” typist. That was news to me. I use my right hand to type “B.” According to the ergonomic keyboards, you’re supposed to use your left hand. Well, I can’t get an ergonomic one, then. It would trip me up too badly.

I also can’t use the standard, square keyboards. My elbows don’t like to be that close to my body, apparently. I need a keyboard that has a curve. Thankfully, we found one. I was tempted to buy two of them, but I settled for getting the warranty on the one we bought. Here’s hoping that’s good enough. 😉

On the topic of keyboards, I do have another story to tell: my adventures with the space bar.

My old keyboard was at least two years old. I’d typed well over two hundred thousand words on it. (That’s the word count from my first two novels. Add in emails, Facebook posts, query letters, blog posts, and so forth. I can’t begin to imagine how many total words it had been used to type.) I noticed, shortly before it died, that the space bar was shiny on the right side. Huh. That’s odd.

Years and years ago, I took typing classes. I remember these classes. They specifically told us that both thumbs go on the space bar, and you can use either thumb to press it. Judging by the shiny spot on my space bar, I’m a right thumb only kind of girl. So, for the fun of it, I sat down and specifically tried typing words and using my left thumb to press the space bar. It didn’t work. I mean, it REALLY didn’t work. It wasn’t until that moment that I noticed I don’t even put my left thumb down. It kind of hangs out above all of my other fingers. Like a supervisor.

So, I thought about it, concentrated on it, and put my thumb down. I forgot how to type. The last time I got my speed tested, I was over seventy five words per minute. As soon as I put that left thumb down, I turned into hunt-and-peck at best. At worst, my hands became crabs with seizures. They wouldn’t function. I cannot type unless that left thumb is hovering. Which would explain the sore spot in my left forearm when I’ve had a busy typing day. Oh, well. Sometimes, it’s not about doing it right, it’s about getting it done.

And, just in case you’re wondering, my new keyboard is already developing a shiny spot on the right side of the space bar. I’m looking at it as a signature. “Katie Lea and her malfunctioning thumbs were here.” 🙂