Family Friday: The things moms say

Pardon my absence. My daughters are back now, and I’ve been busy getting back into the swing of things. One of the things I’ve had to get used to again is all of the odd, random phrases that come out of my mouth.

I know many people who have sworn there are certain phrases they’d never use once they became parents. “Because I’m the mom/dad” seems to top the list, followed by “because I said so” and “wait until your father gets home.” I’m not talking about those phrases. I’m talking about the ones that I never thought I’d have a reason to say. For example:

“What do you mean the water ‘escaped’ from the bathtub?” That was to my youngest, when she was telling me why the bathroom rug was sopping wet.

“Stop licking your sister.” Yeah, I had to say that.

“Get your butt out of the tomatoes.” Apparently, we’d been at the grocery store too long. Wash your produce when you get home from the store. Just a suggestion. 😉

“No, you may NOT feed the cat jelly beans.”

“It’s not funny to pass gas in someone’s face.” If I had a son, I might have expected that one. I have two daughters.

However, for all of the odd phrases that I can’t believe have come out of my mouth, I can’t complain. For each random thing I have to say as a reprimand, there’s a funny play on words that one of my girls has thrown out. While my girls were with my parents, my mom called me to tell me this story:

My dad likes to play the license plate game. Not the one where you look for different states. He likes to play poker with them (two pairs is actually pretty easy to find), or try to make words out of the letters on them. For example, if he found “DRS” he’d say, “I’ve got doctors.” Apparently, he found one that had TSH on it and said “I’ve got a tush.” My youngest turned to him and said “Grandpa, why are you a tush?” Mom almost hit the floor in laughter. “Honey, I’ve been asking him that for forty years.”

Yeah, I missed having my kids around. 🙂

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